Husband and I have been talking intently since 6pm. He& #39;s in bed now.
He said he& #39;s super proud of me and the ways I& #39;ve changed and grown over the last 2yrs. He also said that he was amazed I went out running in a skimpy vest and short shorts today, because "old me" wouldn& #39;t have.

I would have constantly worried about how I looked but today I just wanted to be comfortable running in the heat. I& #39;m so much less self conscious and also more confident with the way I look. He said "but you look good" and I can& #39;t internalise that but it& #39;s good to know.

I know, intellectually, that I am relatively slim even though I have a solid athletic build, and I do look okay in skimpy shorts and a baggy running vest. It& #39;s just hard after being in an industry there my body was constantly criticized for what it wasn& #39;t,rather than what it is.

I& #39;m learning. I& #39;m growing.

Also- it wouldn& #39;t be a problem if I wasn& #39;t slim. I see runners of all sizes every time I& #39;m out and I think they are all badass. I have always felt that size and beauty are kind of unrelated (except when it comes to myself). The brain is a weird place.