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That BLIND PANIC when someone knocks on your front door and you& #39;re writing at your desk butt naked like a weirdo 
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IM HIDING UNTIL THEY GO AWAY THIS IS FINE
Ok so they may be gone but I can& #39;t check without them seeing me in the window. I& #39;m stressing.
NOT GONE NOT GONE
Who tf stays at a door that long you fucking murderer
THEYRE GONE DISASTER AVERTED
They didn& #39;t leave a note or a package or anything but I think they knew I was home because I was crashing around like the idiot gorilla I am
This is an embarrassing post, I am now realizing. Hi new followers, enjoy this new "flash" (non) fiction.
Exclusive footage of me immediately post-knock
