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Dear FBI agent, it has come to my attention that you& #39;ve been assigned to read my correspondences and to follow my movements. I& #39;m sorry. I& #39;m sure you& #39;re going through a lot of Tums.
Dear FBI agent, do you ever wonder why we& #39;re here?
Dear FBI agent, can you share some of those Tums?
Dear FBI agent, have you found my archived Myspace page yet? What am I saying... Of course you have. Must have taken a while to go through all of my angsty poems from high school. Which one was your favorite? Did you like the moving glittery pink skulls and my "F~ck" playlist?
Dear FBI agent, I can& #39;t remember my Steam username and password. Can you plug it in for me?
Dear FBI agent, I& #39;ve been very tired so I haven& #39;t been saying or posting anything you& #39;d find too interesting. Have you guys developed technology to read thoughts yet? If so, I suggest you turn it on because my thoughts are awful loud right now.
Dear FBI agent, apparently the chuds have no sense of humor and are under the impression I believe I& #39;m actually talking to an FBI agent because of this thread. Are you laughing as hard as I am? 
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