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I have been reading Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters and it was so traumatic, after today I am permanently deactivating this account. This thread is about my experience reading this book, I urge you NOT to read it or at the very least, endorse it.
To know that this book is a representation of what my parents thought of me created a sense of fear throughout the book.
I was my mother& #39;s favorite daughter. I did everything she told me, I became a dedicated musician, I excelled and loved science. On top of that, I was a tomboy. My mother was so proud that her daughter embraced her masculinity and didn& #39;t care when people commented on it.
Up until age 5, when my mother stopped dressing me, I wore dresses, I enjoyed the idea of makeup, I had long hair that my mother loved. When I was 5, I started kindergarten and I was allowed to dress how I wanted. I naturally gravitated to the boys sections.
As I went to the boy& #39;s section, my mother said "You sure you want to do that? That& #39;s for boys". It wasn& #39;t until that moment, I realized I wasn& #39;t a boy. I didn& #39;t necessarily think I was a boy. But I didn& #39;t know I was a girl. I learned that day I was a girl.
From 5-13 years old, I was constantly berated by everyone around me including my family that I looked like a boy, acted like a boy, and must be a lesbian. I ended up kissing a girl who thought I was a boy which led to a small group of friends harassing me about being a lesbian.
Little side story that I will never forget: At my elementary school graduation, someone& #39;s grandma asked me if I was a dyke because I was wearing a suit. Googled what a "dyke" meant that night and that was when I started believing I was a lesbian.
At the age of 12, I recognized that I was attracted to girls, and all my crushes up to that point were girls. My mother has enthralled her favorite daughter was a lesbian, forced me to admit I was a lesbian despite reacting poorly to her other daughters being gay.
This entire time, as in my entire life, I was plagued by the feeling of being a boy. I believed I was a boy and I knew I wasn& #39;t a girl. I think it& #39;s important to note, that I didn& #39;t want to be a boy. In fact, my entire childhood and until fairly recently, I wanted to be a girl.
I didn& #39;t want to be a girl for myself. I wanted to be a girl for my family and friends. I recognized my mother& #39;s hatred for men when I was young, and I knew my mother was proud of having only daughters. I knew I would lose her and my entire family. And I did for the most part.
I grew up comfortably middle class, but my mother became disabled. At 13, we moved around for my father& #39;s job, we came back, and my parents divorced. My brother had a child, my sister was in and out of being hospitalized for her eating disorder, and I was depressed.
My middle school forced me to seek therapy, I joined a program for LGBT youth, and told my therapist and a small group of friends that I wanted to be called Kane and i think I would like to go by he/him pronouns. I was ecstatic, but whenever I came home, my happiness fell.
To make a long story short, I came out as trans to my mom the summer before I started high school. She was not happy. Abandoned me on a park bench. My sister picked me up, and I lived with her (She was 19 at the time) until I was able to be placed in a foster home.
I had a mental breakdown my sophomore year of high school after all of this happened. Tried to kill myself. Ended up in mental health treatment for 2 years. I was forced to dropout of high school. The point of me saying this is that: Parents will always believe what they want.
My dad calls me Kane, uses he/him, hasn& #39;t misgendered me in years. He thinks I have a fetish for having sex as a man. My mom calls me my birth name, uses he/him, and still calls me her daughter. She thinks I was brainwashed by the patriarchy.
The point this thread was really the same point of me having this twitter account in the first place. To tell my story and to feel connected to the transgender community. This book really made me think, and I urge you to avoid it, but if you do, there are who care about you.
Like I said, after today this account will be permanently deactivated. If you would like to stay in contact with me, should me a DM. I really appreciate what this account as given me in the sense of a community.
Also anyone who bought a wristband is still getting it. I still exist. I just will not be publicly on twitter anymore and this account will be gone.
