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As a mom, I let Mikay talk back to me as long as:
1. She doesn& #39;t hit me with anything, no throwing of toys or what not
2. She doesn& #39;t say anything foul (bad words, or anything that personally attacks me and not the issue)
3. She explain her side and point well
1. She doesn& #39;t hit me with anything, no throwing of toys or what not
2. She doesn& #39;t say anything foul (bad words, or anything that personally attacks me and not the issue)
3. She explain her side and point well
My point is, I let her tell me why she& #39;s upset or angry rather than tell her to not shout at me or answer me bc I& #39;m her mom. For me, my daughter is human so she& #39;s capable of being angry and invalidating her right to be angry will just damage our relationship
I let her shout, I let her cry if she wants to, she even glares (wc honestly make me feel uncomfortable) but she& #39;s angry. So she has to release her anger. Its better for me to know why she& #39;s angry so I& #39;ll be able to change my ways
Likewise, I don& #39;t hide my emotions to her, although of course, unlike her, I control mine. But I tell her I& #39;m angry and explain to her why. She& #39;ll sometimes ask me why I& #39;m shouting and I& #39;ll tell her straight up, because I& #39;m angry and then explain to her why. And if I& #39;m too angry
I& #39;ll leave her for a while and be alone to control my emotions before explaining to her. She does this too. She& #39;ll get so angry, walk out, stay in the room and then think. She& #39;ll come out and say "I& #39;m sorry I got angry..." and then explain why she was angry
Unlike the traditional "wag mo kong tatalikuran, kinakausap pa kita", i let her leave. I let her cool down and think. And if she apologize, I ask her the question "why". Why are you apologizing? Why did you do that? I want her to know what she did wrong and not just
Apologize to not make me angry anymore. Likewise, I apologize if I shouted at her or gone way overboard, and then again, explain why I got mad.
You see, being a parent is hard, especially in this generation where we want to correct the past generation& #39;s way of handling their children. I grew up holding my emotions to myself, and it is painful. I still carry the wounds until today. I dont want Mikay to experience the same
So I& #39;m trying my bestest to educate her, be open-minded and understanding, and not invalidate her feelings too. I& #39;m not perfect and I& #39;m kinda doing this discipline thing alone. Its hard to discipline a child when you had a rough childhood. So to my future parents out there:
Good luck! And don& #39;t do to your children the things that traumatized you. Save them from the pain you went through.
I never thought this will get a lot of attention, but it pains me to see how many of us have gone thru such experience in the past. I send my virtual hugs to all of you! & thank you so much for ur appreciation 
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="đź’—" title="Wachsendes Herz" aria-label="Emoji: Wachsendes Herz"> i will do my best to be the mother my daugher deserves to have.
