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A lot of y’all aren’t aware of how sexual trauma can turn into hyper sexuality and it shows
You lost your virginity at a more mature age cause you chose to abstain from sex? Good for you, this conversation isn’t for you sir this one out.
If you are experiencing this, you’re not alone and it’s a lot more normal and should be discussed more. I felt like the sexual experiences I was having were normal and okay and even in a way made me desirable because that is what I was taught and left with dealing with
Not only sexual abuse as a child but being sexualized and exposed to people’s (adults make & female) sexual desires and even out of ill intent) And no one to protect me. I’ve accepted that and seen how it shaped my dealings with men, relationships, sex, self esteem, love and all.
The journey to healing is an interesting one because I feel like you don’t really understand until a certain point how this affected you, why, or you might not be aware of feel victimized or ashamed or even that’s anything is wrong. It’s also not talked about so you may
Just do what I did at a certain stage and just deal with it internally. Because you don’t feel like anyone would relate or understand. I dealt with feelings of confusion. It’s heavy to sit with the thought that I had to normalize and dissociate sexual abuse to the point where
I didn’t even realize how deeply it affected me and still healing from til this day
If you are on the path to healing the best thing I did for myself was to become present with my emotions. If I had a sexual encounter or urge I paid attention to how I felt before, during and after. After was the kicker. I dealt with feelings of disillusionment, regret, sadness
A whole range of motions I would go through wether instant or later but it all comes to surface. Reprogramming and realizing the choices I were making had deeper meanings wether it was lack of control, power, intimacy, habit, void filling and false love. It all meant something
If a feeling come up I questioned its source “why am I feeling this way, where else in my life have I experienced this feeling, how many times, where etc” tracing things to the source. Being honest with myself as well as having boundaries and limitations
If you don’t like it, if it don’t feel right. Even when you’re feeling that feverish rebellious streak? Don’t do it. Practicing more self control, finding fulfillment & empowerment in other ways or using different methods, finding balance between being hyper sexual and
Real liberation. Practicing healthy casual sex if that’s what you want but just realizing the reasons and doing things on your term. Because for me I felt like during the hyper sexual phase it’s not even about sex. You’re just having it in place of or because it comes along with
Something you really want and felt like this is a means of it like intimacy etc
Being selective with partners and experiences really helps cut this crap I promise. Yes it sounds pretentious and not so fun but it’s easier to deal with yourself when you cut out the bs. The more I got myself right, the easier it became
Not only to say yes, stop or no. But to see through shit and avoid dealing with or putting myself through more shìt. It’s very worth the self work and helps you understand and better adjust to not only yourself but how you deal with sex and love, relationships and what it is
That YOU want this tie around. What’s good enough for you and just operating on your own terms for you. The more you understand yourself the more you forgive yourself and the lighter you’ll feel as well.
